Sandwich capabilities

DJ Head Hurtz

I'd like to Jenna her von Oÿ.

Wasn't my idea.

Plus, she was reading The Last Tycoon.

Band: Beautiful Sos

The way of all cash-

I'm back on Pop Rocks

Chicks like that have an obligation to cause accidents.

Motto: From many, what?

How you can smell even the length of mown grass...


Signed,
Mary from Baraboo

Sanka's back?

We're all out of context.

What is they whispering about?

(I'd like to chair her committee.)

The Misinterpreted Grin

You never used to see that...

Trouser Hounds of the 21st Century.

Pineapple cubes aswimmin'

(Why do I crave Rolos?)

Sun Low

Shagging late-season flies.

Your fabled softball fields.

My argument against argument books.

Band: The New Oafs

(He must have some wang...)

Turn that anger upside down!

An all-dog revue...

Big scallion

Right song at the wrong time.

(We didn't know the lead singer had died.)


Well, we all look bad when we show up in letters to advice columnists.

(I'd like to refrigerate her Snickers.)

Famous signage

100 reasons, via Radar.

Beaten to life

Looks like somebody has a case of the funs!

(I'd like to pave his way.)

Who's minding the mind?

(If that's the sort of thing you're into.)

(I'm into sort-of things.)

DJ Travel Planz

We don't talk about luck.
It's bad luck.

Museum courtyards, tour buses, etc.

The revelation is: There ain't no revelation.

But then he remembered who he was

Band: The New Laments
Single: I Miss Being Lonely

Who's dignifying who

Airport candy machine.

I like my grill marks painted on.

I wouldn't dignify those pebbled, machine-littered expanses by calling them "roofs."

There is that...


(I'd like to pump some liquidity into their local economy.)

Deceptive angle

New store: Terrible Price

I'd like to become a guy who swims laps.

Quit Lloyding your Dobbler over me.


(Was that chick real, or a hologram from the dark side of my balls?)

Bringing back "cinchy"

Bra strap insouciance.

His pet name was Sugar Packet.

And he sure knew how to wear a headband.

(Now it belongs to the world.)


(Brining my time...)

Russian Business Tattoos

Rapper: Hush Money

This place runs on Jarritos.


(But then what would we recycle?)

Next person paying with cash

(I'd like to Waldorf her Astoria.)

Whatever your theology-

Better you than some stranger.

Better some stranger than you.


Excuse me, there's a butterfly on your back.

Kikkoman tote bag w/ dog.

Hold her feet while she does sit-ups...

Nothing is overpriced

Pixie in Volvo.

The Old License Plates

Place where people say things like, "I don't paint apartments. I paint the universe: armpits, football fields, dogs...."

Brand Skankin' New

Every word is a decision.

Award for best wearing of a Notre Dame sweatshirt goes to...

(We blew our stories over the tops of bottles.)

Girls on dirt bikes

Where are the mosquitos?

Band: Old Men Under Broken Umbrellas
Hit single: Plastic Grocery Bag

A year we would never forget...
(Wait--which year?)

What mall?

You know the old saying, "You know the old saying?"?

Today, he said, we live forever.

I prefer my drinks tightly carbonated or not at all.


They brought in a three-legged dog to be an inspirational barker.
It worked.

Godfather of Soullessness

An elder statesfrog...

Where did we end up eating that night?

Band: The Wink Martindales

Children's book: Craig's First Cheese Plate


A cat with curly hair?

Graffito

Winner of some award you never heard of

Band: The Realists

Written in condensation.

The strong police presence at the Union Square Barnes and Noble...

(I'd like to Penguin her Classics.)

Taken to task for my overuse of "taken to task."


Meet me at fire fly park...

You two know each other?

Succulent pearbody...

I'm hoping she slips up.

Taken to task for my overuse of the word "succulent."

The power of then.

The newsstand in the subway at 14th and 7th...

You work out?

Studies show--

Watermelon motif.

Too hot for metaphors...

Guys like that give hipsters a bad name.


(Out by where the old Sears used to be.)

The Reminders

Better with a beard.

Soul food at the start of the world.

The poetry of parking regulations...

Band: Old Computers

I'd like to grow tomatoes.

Hired kooks...

Post industrial fans

Maybe that's part of it?

Reminiscent of a passport stamp.

I'd like to counter her culture...

(But do it without using the phrase "graveyard shift at Denny's.")

Neither are you

As bleepy as it gets.

Motto: Don't Stomp On Me!

Clacking dominoes around the table...

(I'd like to Dodi her Fayed.)

(You pick up on that stuff early.)

But what would they sell?

Business: Snatchy McVadge's Ginchatorium

Navy Rock

Tote-baggery

What's she doing in the street?

(I'd like to Amos her Oz.)

Runs vs. Points

Melt in twos

See through shirts

(We would sit and meditate on desire.) 

The ring tones of our ancestors

Did I agree to that?

Being and somethingness.

Pringles on the beach...

The Concerned Looks

I have deep respect for that kid in the sweatshirt eating Munchos.

Come out with your buns glazing!

Sucked through straws

Irritable vowel syndrome.

The wrong, silent type.

Where did you get those stupid T-shirts?

I like the way they're weighted.

I'll buzz you in

Dream liver

School chairs

Kayak carrier, but no kayak.

To the girl in the NYPL reading Diasporic Meditations-


(That can't be her real name...)

The Neithers

Plummy Depths

Terrycloth Fantasia

The Stained Glass Cats

Skies alive!

(I'm more excited about America's next bottom model.)

Computer Alert

I'd like to labor under her delusions.

How green was my lantern?
Seriously--how green?

An old-fashioned right-of-way argument.


Your type-

In concert

The You Could Do Thats

Who can run in this haze?

Fence rental.

Helicopter sound effects.

The religion with the footrests...

(It was a simple morning, but I treasure it.)

Regional champions

Breeze boys

Prescision for nothing

Math rock grrl band:
The Tragic Figures


(Good name for a cat)

That same amazingness

They'll squirt it with whatever flavor you want.

Turn the game on.

Land of the free refill.

The nipple effect.

I've managed to skirt that as well.

People don't act like they do in paintings.

(They must have figured I was insane.)

Cop belt for sale

Band: The Good Things Going

I'd like to Mos Eisley her Spaceport.

(Tennis balls against a wall.)

Aced it

High-waisted

High, wasted...

Hy weighs Ted.

Hi, wasted!

Highways, Ted,
highways.


(Looking good this year.)

(The optimistic, rubbery smell of the bike shop.)

The Ain't Nots

It was a great catch phrase.

It is with some measure of regret that I

New thing: eating with chopsticks taken from a hairdo.

(I don't know how to answer that.)

What I'm not sure

We can learn a lot from this fat, one-footed pigeon.

Looking through the statue's legs.

Is that neon, rubber sunglass style back?

I can't believe 10 years ago was 10 years ago.

Tailing the day away-

(I never did get that joke.)

Kicking sand

This is worth reading twice.

What proximity promotes

That is one surreal-tastic blimp.

Baby rap: In Da Sling

(I'd like to unite her nations.)

Marinate like the pros

Soft-nosed negotiations-

They pop up in every hot tub.

I haven't been fishing in years.


(That's just an old urban mist.)

In the no

I'm stoked about using "stoked" way more often.

I miss that cafe. It was on my street.

And I don't care who knows it.


(What were we rooting for, exactly?)

Watering down water

Her dark eyes or dark guys?

Guise?


I like this letter.

Or would I?

I'd like to unintend her consequences.

Maybe Haruki her Murakami.


Can anyone sit here?

(It depends on which news you follow.)

The answer may surprise you

(Or it may not.)

We should be so flukey

Hike those!

A museum of scandals.

(The movie was better.)

Self-serving ice cream.

Let me just double-check my email real quick.

(Isn't it about time I ran into Macgregor Card on Broadway?)

How is this relevant?

America's most quoted.

The empinkening...

Just happy to be off the team.

He sketched everyone in crayon...

Velcro faith

Cuter than absolutely necessary.

Get your dapple on.

Park-wide sax ban.

Are you saying I shouldn't have called her Freckle Tits?

It was a phrase of affection.

(I've never seen yogurt spooned with such passion.)

Band: The Dirty Parts

Feels like vacation

Table jam at Mill Lane.

Band: European Cities

I like these people.

Sneaking onto the landmarks commission.

The accomplishment of not caring about accomplishments.

Overly

Hey--where did you get that Sno Cone?

You're asking a lot from those shoes.

For a second I thought she was running towards me!

I'll hide out by that flowering tree.

Flower store

There's bound to be some overlap.

What's forty years?

(I'd like to pool her tips.)


I'll be thinking about you
while I think of you.

I'm here for the event

How did you get up there?

Double what it should be.

I got to admit--

Fills out that skin nicely.

The Twinge Town Players.


Charity: Save My Spot

Paradise by the bagel register

Try the house pickle.

That's what we in the industry call a

I don't know about you but

Let's watch these young people paint the fence.

I sure would like to blurb her novel.

(Internet: revenge of the peanut gallery)

Tongue burn

Curly enough for ya?

Quartet: The Hims

Pocketless wonder

The future was reflected in her shades.

That thing about stirrup pants...

Motorola's success must be due in part to its old-timey name.

(We had no Winnie Cooper.)

But not really

Everybody:
Jump in with answers!

Heavy Zipper Pulls

Crackdown on Public Belt Adjustment (PBA)

Band: The Woefully Incomplete

(Man, I haven't googled her in ages...)

You might want to wait a few minutes

Was Papa Smurf crying?

Is that a real question?


(I'd like to thump her Bible.)

(I want those shoes from the billboard.)


Bands:
The Expiration Dates
The Well Used
The Light Outs

I held her responsible

(Tight and well into the night)

Forgot to leave

The bartender made all the difference.

Mint your way to health.

Band: Massive Layoff

(I'd like to plug her website.)

(We were trapped in space
warped by someone...)

Healthy contempt

Golf club as walking stick.

Game show:
What Does That Even Mean?

At the museum:
Without prices listed, how can we begin to understand?

(I'll pretend I need to be somewhere.)

Bread

Where do they grow these chicks?

Is he their dad-figure or what?

(We were there for the shift change.)

(It seems fun here.)

(We cheer for what we recognize.)

(I'm part phlegmish.)

The Rooting Interests

Sheesh for America.

I'd rather do that with the dog watching.

(My only news is something I dreamt during a nap.)

(I'm dumber than I let on.)


The guitar jam at the end of the video for "La Bamba" by Los Lobos.

Like that scene in-

I like to pretend she works for the government.

Dirty, dirty glasses.

Give everybody credit.

New Olympic event: Technology Toss


I'm not sure the concept of sustainability is sustainable.

Time line lies

Off to the raindrops-on-the-window races!

I'm surprised that old futon shop is still around.

All these TV antennas on rooftops-
noble monuments to the way we used to receive TV signals.

(I'd like to buy her chapbook.)

Dream rehab

I'm all about the phrase "I'm all about..."

Game show: Is That a Joke?

Band: The Big Themes

Licking up history...

The Unresented

Cool bike.

We made out on that ridge.

I like her sweaty Michigan T-shirt.

(Women who describe semen as "yummers.")

She's got the brains,
I've got the scrawn.

Every Sal's

He's changing the register tape.

What's that a euphemism for?

I'd like to Sunday her afternoon!

(She wants to watch the finale...)

They have shots for that

This street goes back in time
(Not directly)


(Not even antique seltzer bottles can save us now.)

The Marketing Decisions

I said to him,
Let's go to the beach and write screenplays.

Busting out of that vintage blouse-
Like a prison break.

(I'd like to subject him to a gratuity charge.)

(I still hold the low score on Zaxxon.)

Hot damn

We were eating Hot Sam
Papa jarred his own jam
Pebbles loving Bam-Bam
Gangsters with their scram-scram.
Cookouts with the fam
Setting up the Zim Zam
I've really grown to love ham.
She was reading Matt Klam
Our DJ name was K-Blam.
We had flim without flam
I'm stripping for the cam
I never could say "ma'am."
Cracker-up with Tam Tam
Makes me think of old Gram

Puddle-inspired

Some good, squishy mud here.

Kids jogging--seems wrong.

That's my moonslice!


The House Hold Names

The Tragically Chubby


(Your animal must be this furry to enter.)

There was so much I wanted to ask her...

(Not actually. But it sounds nice.)

Smile for the satellite

Everybody's a cipher, nowadays.

Pre race rituals

Orthodox exercise.

It pools in you.

Old dirty bastion.

She is a stretch.

That's some forlorn fun you got there.

That being said,

I'd like to congee her village.

The Lugs

I dig her suit and angry look.

They sure know how to order.

Them lagers pour nice.

Let's talk real estate.

(He could use yoga more than anyone I know.)

(I didn't realize she was she.)

Did I?

I must have.

At some point.

Right?

Atomic Snowfall

Meanwhile, back at the computer lab...


All this for one guy?


(At least it smells like a shoe store.)


I'll be at the corner of the corner bar.
Drinking corner juice.


(I'd like to flag her as inappropriate.)

Broadcast thyself

They have these all over in L.A.

(I'd like to pickle her ginger.)

This is what passes for nostalgia?

The Intelliprefix Corp

Not everything was better when I was a kid.

The Wet Cats

(I wouldn't mind coming back here for dinner.)

What took me so long

(I'm still on my way to that track meet.)

You I knew

An open window in the library.

That has to be the town I'm thinking of.


Graffiti with question marks...

A lasting fad

(I'd like to badger her bristles.)


The street had a bend.

I used to bike by her house,
hoping that


(They're going back to the old logo.)

Historic playscapes

The Same Things

The Modest Profits

Moon suits--
(still suits)


(I honestly can't tell the difference.)

The Excused

Not satisfied with satisfaction.

Wrapping things in rubber bands.

I would love to see a porno starring you two.

(Not a pickup line, exactly.)


The fun of work/
The work of fun


Don't tell me that beard isn't art!


(You're only young a bunch.)

The Punkosphere

The way she knocked the snow from her boots.

(What about it?)

Ask the ethnicist.

Enough name-taggery.

We were out-glassed.

(I have no idea how old she is.)

This air has a lot going for it.

How about a hand for the clarity of city lights in cold weather?

(Of course it's stolen.)

Half a word away-

For some reason I never go to this deli.

And I prefer small bananas.


What was that look?


And a child shall chide them.


Beware of professors who overuse "modernity."


Ah, moral ambiguity.


And the soft mint of York...

Similar incidents

She was a space heater.

The overminer.


We should all be so spry.
(Should we?)


Small Sprite--
no ice

Befriend an institution today

The So Not Funnies

Honor bites.

I'd rather be reading the paper.

Of another time.


(Winter reminds me of summer.)

Sacred mistrust

Those campus molecules...

A new mantra?
You don't use the one you have!

The New Old Timers
The Unrealized
The Plucks

(We thought that was hard rock.)


I feel old again!

(While dancing in your head, in a prairie.)


(My name and pseudonym are the same.)

Out vergin'

You sure you should be squatting there?

These fools out searching for "the real."

Before it gets torn down.


What are we radiating?

Who goes here?

The Try Me's

(He's playing hard to pet.)

Some great piercings...

Do you have an animal in there?


Yellow lights
Foreign books
Arm-in-arms
A map of nooks


Vestigial sweaters

(I don't use those words.)

The Iconettes

Emails from robot poets.

I like when games take place too late for this edition.


The stuff they fed us...

Unwinding wires

Bands:
-The Obvious
-Accidents of Birth

Neon pizza guy.

This whole thing needs to be redone.

Metaphors for Impotence.

Once again, Night saves the Day.

(I'd like to grind her lenses.)

I skipped most of it

Aquaman-like

And here is where I fell in love with the cheese Danish.

(A Hot & Crusty in the corner of Grand Central Terminal)

A salad of dubious greens.

(Not so All-American.)

Women buying pipes

How about those thick black straws?

Monsters of the malt shop.

Those crazies missed you.

Is this enough?

He was as dull as a bank.
(Also as assuring.)

Get pixelated!

Disbelief is as tough as belief

These foggy ballfields.

I threw a coin and
wished to see ripples.


Band: The Minor Accomplishments


That hotel smell...in your house!

To me it's all that street.


(Say a blessing over the people saying blessings over things.)