Pastry on the wind

The squeak of beans.

Does anyone ever use those balconies?

I'll never forget that joke.

It doesn't translate into nothing.


The world through Advil Liqui-Gel colored glasses--

Twiggishness

You and your leafy greens.

The kids are hanging upside-down by their knees.

Autumn screen.


I'll do some detective work.

And maybe Wild Cherry LifeSavers will be my new thing.

(This is not what we trained for...)

Repeat after me

We were out smarting.

More sad banjo

What's so wrong with being a zombie?

I'm jealous of this cheerily mournful music--
Perfect for chopping vegetables.

Bring on the translucent bowls!

(He and I share a plaid.)


(I'd like to mix her metaphors.)

Mutter museum

Band: The Oh No He Didn'ts

There's ink on my pants.

This is quite a romantic train.

Sheconomist

Furriness-lined boots

They met during freshman orientation.

Everything's a hate crime, nowadays.

Late for ninjitsu class-


(Reincarnated as a celebrity jogbra.)

Pigtail vengeance

Career woman power-smoking. Takes me back.

Do I look as crazy as that?

I've been meaning to buy a Chip Clip for the last seven years.

Small market stuff

I've wondered about that bowling alley.

(A lot of ads on this station.)

When the light in her bedroom window really meant something...

That high tech bull

My mantra was there all along.

I need some start-up cash.
And something to start.

Enough of your Brooklyn Bridgery.

Some competitive leisure-

Hey--they're serving our seasoning!

Those dreamy side streets...

Looked up

These pointless errands have a point.

Over caste

Be careful of the insults you use.

(I don't know how to act.)

Be more present...

I don't deserve you

That familiar stretch.

A woman's sense of shoes--

You don't have to come up with universal maxims.

(I'd arrange those freckles to spell something special...)

That can't be right

Death is as afraid of you as you are of it.

That guy rules

Sit across from me.

My stomach hurts.

If I open a pants store, it'll be called Trouser Town.

Is that a phrase?

Am I the only one who still calls them freedom fries?

The hoboes took that over a long time ago.

Ziggy would be a great name if not for "Ziggy."

Or might not miss

The old guy.

You can no longer call someone and let the phone ring 50 times. Technology always picks up. But there was poignancy to eliciting that mechanical ringing in an empty house. Or, even more fraught, in a house where someone was avoiding the phone. It was a statement with echo.

This we'll miss

Churchless grandeur

Or the breeze is the truth.

Get a load of that definition!
(Said at gym or library)

Where my frisbee friends at?

It's like my dad always said,
(Well, not exactly like it.)

They've been working on that building awhile now.

Compiling evidence against what I'm not sure.

But the past is one thing that gets less real by the minute.

Tattoo ruins

Somebody like that walking towards me-

There are better things to be obsessed with.

Nice Kikkoman bag.

They'd better have bad aim.

(It was a lot of money back then.)

Hey-I was drinking that

Is it fresh?
I want to see the lemons.

Some of that old-fangled sincerity.

And no muck to muck things up.

What kind of monster do you think I am?
Seriously, what kind?

Under the overpass

What's your deal?

We're so stupid.

What am I looking at?

Crushed cars on a truck.

How "radioactive" sounds quaint.

Her diaphanous plan-

(I'd like to stuff her animal.)

(Hey-I know him.)

Small fries

That sweet, sweet bitterness.

Those legs should be the new symbol for eternity.

I miss the life of the mind.

Counter offer at the Waffle Hut

I fell in something.

Not sure I trust those scale models of the universe.

We're necessarily kidding ourselves.

The interchangeability of baby pictures-

(And me a member of the incompetentsia.)

I'll be at the Lake Forest Oasis, watching cars.

Fly season

I bought myself out.

I'll be at the sushi counter.

To them, we're the oddballs.

What about if tragedy goes on strike?

Burger momentum

Need to get away and lose some perspective.

A time machine that transports us to right now.

You're welcome to come to dinner with us.

Those little earrings...

Eternity is a temporary concept.

Still

Blame the cable company,
But also praise the cable company.

The new disconnectivity.

Smells like farmer's market.

Battle of the ice cream bells and rock and roll.

My new cliche:
That's pepper through the grinder.

But I really would like to buy the world a Coke.

Hey there young sport

All these philosophies cancel each other out. Or in.

A song to protest protest songs.

That ending was a cop out.

What's the big idea?

Don't spit that back!

Business, lady.

Aspire to amateur.

(I thought those were extinct.)

The English Muffin truck

I love that she made fun of me for that.

Turf has its own beauty--
Check out the pick-up soccer games in Sara D Roosevelt park between Broome and Grand.

Now that's the Harley I'd ride if I rode a Harley.

(I said she could Hoyt my Schermerhorn any day.)

You should go

With this in mind.

The Lyric Diner

(I'd like to post a menu in her window.)

That is some sexy gray hair.

I have those shoes!

The comfort of an old church gym-


(There are plenty of men in shirtsleeves leaning out of windows, but they're not necessarily lonely.)

I was talking to the fries

Gentlemen of the evening-

No bad clam jokes.

Let's run off to small town USA.

Deep breaths might work,
but they'll have to be pretty deep.


(Just some basic lesson I never picked up.)

Helicopters for peace

More essays on the eroticization of childhood.

Downloading old Loudness.
(Thunder in the East)

These storms aren't symbolic.

(I wouldn't mind icing her coffee.)

Temporary fencing

That accent will kill us all!

Beauty needs distance.

(I'd like to picnic on her Great Lawn.)

Forgetting the setting

Those daytime moons...

Keep me downdated.

Salad compliment: "Nice toss."

Everything must glow!

Are you sure about that dog?

(My two favorite spots in the park are: here, here, and here.)

Countless essences

Even when I know it isn't her...

The long legs of the law.

The decline of the internet: e-rosion

(Where did that building come from?)

I was reading immortal poems on the beach

The right to pursue interpretations of the pursuit of happiness.

The mournful joy of listening to The Replacements while driving.

Whether it's relevant or not is irrelevant.

The vocabulary on that guy!

Makes me wish I wish I smoked.

Might as well be...

That outfit moves me.

Does the wordplay of "Japanimation" work in Japanese?

Does Crest toothpaste have a crest?

How do they keep the Lever House so clean?

What are all these bugs?

What kind of question is that?

I like people who remind me of Tim Kazurinsky.

No--but I can predict who will try and predict the future.

I'll just assume this is a prank, and treat it as such.

But this is what I came here for!

The breeze is like a time machine.

It's going to take a lot of ice cubes...

I don't even want to know how music works.

(It sounded a lot better in the store.)

Paradise bow

This gazpacho is taking a lot longer than 20 minutes.

Dig that Pin Point Carbonation.

I still say it was worth it.

She makes me want to kill myself
(but in a good way)

Summer reading: character break

A serialized novel, Happyland by J. Robert Lennon, starts in this month's Harper's. It's great. I can't wait for Part II. If you don't have a subscription to Harper's--come on, man.

Books bought or checked out of library in the last few weeks:

-The Boy Who Fell Out of the Sky by Ken Dornstein. Eerie. More on this.
-Bukowski: A Life by Neelie Cherkovski. Research. Not as terrible as the reviews on Amazon would have you think, but pretty redundant.
-A Million Little Pieces by James Frey. Research, I swear. Has anyone actually read it? Why doesn't he indent?
-Physical, An American Checkup by James McManus
-Eichmann and the Holocaust by Hannah Arendt. Part of Penguin's new "Great Ideas" series. I still have a crush on Hannah. And I may have to re-think some thoughts on Nazis.
-Fitzgerald and Hemingway: A Dangerous Friendship by Matthew J. Bruccoli. Nobody writes letters anymore. Is that bad? Not sure.
-A Good School by Richard Yates. Been re-reading all his books, and I'm not a re-reader.
-JPod by Douglas Coupland. Found an advance reading copy for a buck at the Strand. Have stayed away from his last five or so. Over 20 pages are occupied by the first hundred thousand digits of pi (w/ one incorrect digit). Good gag.
-Remote Feed by David Gilbert. Funny stories. Had this book before.
-Straight Man by Richard Russo. If, like me, you're a sucker for misadventures in academia novels, this looks good. Only on P. 25. Great paragraphs. "I don't see how you could not kid about love and still claim to have a sense of humor."

Kettle of Fish

Takes me back-
Though I'm not sure I was ever there.

Up in the boundary waters.

The goatees you grew up with...

So glad this place is here

Gameshow: How is this not porn?

These shorts? I've had them for years.

In ATMs I trust.

Seriously-are you kidding?

"(You do not learn about people by asking them questions.)"
-Hemingway, in a letter

Then we weren't

The kid in the bright yellow Alf shirt.

We'll let the judge be the judge of that.

You don't look like you're from around here.

Restoring my lack of faith...

(Doesn't make you any smarter)

GBV

(God Bless Veselka)

You've got to hand it to these pierogi.

What can I say?
I like my pork pulled.

Inside jokes propel this planet.

Fountain ale-

(I wonder what sort of funny nicknames they have for me...)

I should've said something

Sneak a pique.

We were all suckers.

Scalloped--

By the Swoony River.

Delectability ratings

(I'm hanging up now.)

Swallowing bugs

Not rue again!

Was he looking at or past me?

Listen, Red

Careful what you wear

Eurotrash v. Eurotreasure

Great, lonely views.

Cartoon characters (and me):
We go where we're drawn to.

You guess

Everyone's an expressionist.

Left on La Cienega.

(It still exists, barely, in snapshots.)

I think we were at that cafe...

Non-emergency use only

They're a different religion--not a different species.

"Beautiful" as a euphemism.

Hard to believe there'll be a day when these shirts don't make sense.

Menu prose.

We like the drone.

(There's nothing not to get.)

Half the country

Theoretically, we're getting a lot done.

Courses in tavern etiquette

Look--an American Shorthair.

I only sit with my back to the door.

(Like everyone around me could be a star.)

Teen geese

All-girl army.

Summer-dress induced madness.

Ads that speak with confidence on nature's intent.

Heard that song, loved it, left it.

What do you say we make these grades suffer?

Winning ambivalence

(Watching her read closely.)

I can be very righteous about decrying righteousness.

No monopoly on blue sky...

But my plan!

Lugging around grudges against airlines...

(Remind me not to be a kid again.)

What's the connection?



-Dedicated to the stray cats of Tellaro.

You get the idea

Testosteroni

The Inconclusives

Combobulating

Geeky sheen

To whom are you speaking?

I'm thinking of having my memories animated.

Let's give it up for the design of Burger King's mod black coffee lids.

Pining for the dial tone.

It smells like Six Flags, somehow.

When did we start worrying?

The comfort of stall graffiti...

Nothing is something, no?

Hey, day

Gee...force

If only Emily Dickinson were around and firing up a web log...

Is there any benefit to hiding anxieties?

Well-woven into pop songs...

I pine for college far less than I figured.

Had to be taught that.

And here I'm dreaming about Cozzi Pizza and grape soda...

Lacquered up

Untethered ball.

Mounted bottle openers.

Dude, I still have nightmares about that.

Damn straits...

Fountain water

The work of posture/
The posture of work

Huffing that freshly cut grass.

...really more of a mourning person...

(On the other hand, I'm like, bring it on.)

That's no picture

History is filled with examples.

The messenger bag capital of the world.

Fonz: exhibit ayyy.

Catch-all survey:
Was it worth it?

T-shirts in translation

Summer retort:
So's your old fan.

Selective embrace

Band:
Wow, Really?

Hitler Trivia

An add-junk lecturer.

Those really skinny buildings...

(Let me get back to you when this pill kicks in.)

Holding patterns

Promo: essay about 80s teen sex comedies here.

How is that guy?

(Back then, I'd smoke anything.)

My phone rings hollow.

Search without seizure

Like I'm going to sit around reading Boethius.

(Though I wouldn't mind tossing "Boethian" around now and again.)


I dishonestly don't remember.


Do you mind if I ask how much those were?

How much were those?

Assignment:

Invent a joke with the punchline, "He's taking up for lost mime."

She made a career of it

I'd like to be a beer vendor at Wrigley Field for a summer, then write a folksy memoir about the experience.

Is there a show that can make it a reality?


President: Forlorn soda machine fan club, 7-Up division


Is that feather floating or flying?

Franchise opportunity

Let's send up their conventions.

At a convention.

The huevos of the future--

(I'd like to McVeggie her burger.)

Thought I'd find you here

The name "Kidman" as a condensed biography.

Could you please not wipe that stupid grin off my face?

Shoevenile

On this spot in...

We were leading questions.

Ice T was singing about Evil E...

Where were you?/Where was I?

Sanbitter: like siphoning grapefruit juice from a Vespa.

Please the day

On the beach we ran unopposed.

Our very blood

People complaining that a product is merely "flavored water."
But everything is flavored water.


I'd like to be one of those brainiacs who revolutionizes the game.
Any game.

Knowing it won't

The ridiculousness of seriousness.

An all-star tribute to the word “daze”

Textbook: Unsolvable Problems

(This banana really tastes like a banana.)

Don’t get back to me. Get back to me.

Quality of light

The way rain changes distance.

Wait'll I get a hold of those molecules.

Take refuge here and there.

You're exaggerating.

(How old is this burrito?)

Go back to where you first thought it

Strange police doings-

This might be a blood-sugar thing.

If it is a fake, it's so beautiful it doesn't matter.

We'd better get cracking on these tic tacs, as they're only good until August of 2007.


(That's for you to know and me to find out.)

Anybody who's everybody

Speak in things that sound like code-
(I have no business here.)

Revel in baglessness.

Dig that drape.

Where are you sitting?

(I was over the impression that we had an agreement.)

Vacation's end

They get points just for heading in the opposite direction on the escalator.

Maybe hearing that song once was enough.

(Photos aren't memories.)

Bare feats

Meaning is an imposition.

Be wary of syllogisms.

Evocative in the way of old area codes-

(Where have all the smirky girls gone?)

Same argument every year

A dog named Naught

Book: "Salt Water Taffy: An Oral History"

I'd be upset if people didn't make fun of my poems.

Pour your water from on high.

(Or did focus lose you?)

Immaterial Girl

New Jerk City

No one does

What a good pillow salesman would say.

He gave us a foul tip.

Don't ask me that.

A cat as "too petty."

At last

"(M)oney wants to be free--that's why it swims out of your pocket."

-from "Sweet and Low" by Rich Cohen

Spending attention

At least our schools had clocks with sweeping second hands.

This day needs yet another name

Making out with memories.

My worldview was shaped by the frozen yogurt dispenser.

Remember when that awning was new

Concerts billed as "An Evening With"

You look smart.

I promise the next one will be better.

Baiting fate.

Sun-blown

Nodding at nothing.

The new tense.

Finally, the protagonist we deserve.

Carve your own little Nietzsche.

I keep forgetting to get

Do I want a bottle of cola

Everycity

A chart tracing the popularity of the nickname "Knuckles" over time.

While you're alive, could you...

(What we're allowed to make fun of)

Know nothing, but know it inside-out

Martially artful

Outwhistle the birds?

Earrings to unnerve.

Post-pill shudder.

Hard to believe we ran all that way...

Hey

I saw a bluebird today.
Does that make me gay?
It may.

That graffiti cheers me

I'll breath this wood-smoked air and stare.

Let's be cleansed by antique soap ads.

He only sees the worst in peepholes.

Memory isn't everything

His breathing alone tells a story

"One day we will all die, and then we'll be the same as that tree--no me, no you. Be that as it may, we need heat."

-Monk in Tony Soprano's coma dream

Sunday stroll report

That blend of contentment and dread-

This meaning...

How long can this last?

Trending

I encourage dark sarcasm in the classroom.

(Faux eternity)

Take this the wrong way

And on the seventh day,
people created God.

I won't get drawn into arguments over falafel quality.

L.T.F.P.
(Love This Freakin' Place)

Elision Fields

Don't raise your lettering at me!

(Nothing alt about this country.)

The one truly American art form:

Declaring things to be the one truly American art form.

Line for line

"History wasn't made, thank God."
-UConn coach Jim Calhoun

These skyscrapers give me a boner.

She contains multitudes. Believe me.

Shopped

Great gift idea = bad regular idea

Like you rent the place

Folding pizza boxes,
stacking them to make a
Great Wall.

Apparently, they've gone out of business.

Were they flashing their lights at us?

Who thinks about who more?

Her imperfections are perfect.

Studying what doesn't matter.

My half-assed belief in fate holds that fate itself is half-assed.

(A profound wait.)

And then what?

A table of wonder-junk for sale.

You pick things up along the way.

If language is a prison, it's one of those minimum-security, country-club deals.

Meanwhile, back at the cafe...

The Dubious Honors

Have a seat.

A scene from "Basquiat" was shot on this bench.

I shouted, "Dana!"
But it wasn't her.

How about some applause for childhood,
which does and doesn't last forever.

We always seem to end up here.

Works for now

The strict borders of cultural currency in effect:
Hot-shot high school athletes wearing letter jackets in Midtown Manhattan.

Photo project:
Mall fountains across America

The year of magical drinking

Almost almost spring

Schoolgirl consciousness

Remember when I was waiting for you at that park?

The city is still smoking those giant orange-and-white striped cigars.

On TV: A show of force

The cat across the way and I have an understanding.

A flash mob of one

I will note her cliffs.

But for a good reason

Those make me excited and nervous.

Did I think this or just say it?

(happy anniversary)

Doesn't count

I like everything by The Vapors except "Turning Japanese."

Where are our eloquent poets of gain?